Not 140 Characters

Enter messagemessages2

Am I coming in clear? Can you hear me out there? For all the world, and all the universe, I hope you can. I send this to you this day, so that you may understand.

What’s happening?whats-happening-on-twitter

With me? With the world? With this very existence on this small blue dot? I don’t even know anymore.

What’s on your mind?fb-whats-on-your-mind

The words I would speak aloud? Or the words only my conscious has ever heard? I can’t tell you how many times I have had to defy my own will in order to keep from saying the words dancing on the edge of my tongue.

Share your story here…img_96621

My story? You want my story on this blank canvas? My story is my own, but if you wish it, I may share it with you. Only if you promise no judgement, and no hate. Only if you promise you will listen with open ears.

All the words we speak, feel, think, and cherish in this life, can they really be requested in simple phrases? Can we real consolidate them to short blurbs of nothingness and send them out to the world without a bat of an eye? Are we really so far gone that none of it has any meaning anymore? Take a snapshot, and give it one word; you can’t. Stop asking for everything, but expecting nothing. If you want to give it all, share it explicitly, or not at all. If you want to keep it in, protect it, but don’t give it a chance to glimpse even the slightest bit of freedom and dull everything you ever knew.

Live without simple phrases. Live without consolidation. Live without mindlessness. Live free. Speak all. Feel all. Think all. Cherish all. This is life. Not 140

Need to Decompress

I have always said that I am a gluten for punishment, and I live up to it regularly. I find new ways to add on to my plate, and eventually, I get so overloaded that I have to take a step back, regroup, and figure out how to tackle everything I promised to take on. This is definitely one of those moments. I am looking for my center then trying to add things slowly back into the mix to find the balance I lost somewhere along the way.

The good news is that I am scheduled to graduate this time next year with my Bachelor’s degree from SNHU (Southern New Hampshire University), so that will be one large chunk of weight off my shoulders. I also just finished another certification program at work, so I am officially a CAP-TA through IAAP. See a previous post for more information about them. My daughter is hinting at wanting to be potty-trained, so that will be another alleviating moment once she masters that feat. All in all, some things will be falling off my scale here shorty, so I am trying to see the finish line through the haze of the bombarding

Through all the chaos that seems to happening around me, I have tried multiple times to pick up the diet and workout plan I had successfully been on before I became pregnant, but to no avail. I’ve come to determine that there just isn’t enough time in the day to deal with everything I have taken on, and try to diet and exercise as heavily I had been pre baby. I don’t have time to make a breakfast or lunch, so I grab a protein shake and whatever Lean Cuisine I can find before hitting the road. I tried doing it the night before, but again, I don’t have time between dinner, bath, and bedtime routine if I want to get to bed at a decent hour and/or have some “mommy time” or pay any attention to my husband.

So I did what any mom would. I scoured the internet for what other moms do when they want to diet and exercise with a full plate of commitments. I found that you are either a “fit mom” or an “excuse mom”, and I was definitely an “excuse mom”. These type of moms are the ones that come up with a whole handful of reasons as to why they can’t lose weight or diet while the “fit moms” have ab muscles and tiny waists, and say that “excuse moms” are just lazy.

How about I’m just a mom trying to do the best I can for my child? I may not be taking care of myself as well as I should in the diet and exercise aspect, but I am filling my heart full of memories, and trying to better myself through education and hard-work in my career to provide the best life I can for my daughter. That may not make me a “fit mom”, but that sure as hell doesn’t make me an “excuse mom”, either.

I digress on my rant, but I hope I leave everyone with the idea that life comes in stages. Right now, my stage is self-enlightenment through education. Maybe as my daughter gets older and more independent, and I finally add a diet and exercise plan to my balancing act, then it will be healthier mom time. Until then, I’ll just enjoy making

Starshot Project – Interstellar Travel

I’ve never been the real science and space type, but every now and then I happen upon an article that really puts me in awe. I was stumbling through some news articles about health where melatonin may be used to stop or weaken the spread of breast cancer which is amazing in its own right, but I happened to scroll to the bottom of the article to read headlines for other articles when one caught my eye.

A planet orbits around the closest star to our Solar System — and it may be habitable.

I clicked on the link just to see what the article may contain, and as I was reading it, I literally felt like it was straight out of a movie or video game. There is a star called Proxima Centauri, some 30,000 years away if traveled by rocket, which has a planet called Proxima b orbiting it. Proxima Centauri is a cool red dwarf, so its inhabitable range for orbiting planets is relatively close in proximity compared to our sun, but Proxima b is smack dab in the middle of said range! Meaning that Proxima b may be inhabitable if the atmosphere is found to be like ours and if there is liquid water present.

Stephen Hawking Helps Launch Project ‘Starshot’ for Interstellar Space Exploration.

It’s a lot of if’s, but Stephen Hawking declared back in April of this year (2016) that Project Starshot would be the first Nanocraft to explore Proxima b. The newly designed space craft would be light in weight with a sail and laser beams to transmit information back to us by using a processor that costs no more than an iPhone, but the most amazing part of the Nanocraft is how fast it will be able to travel. Instead of a 30,000 year journey our current space vehicles would take to make it to Proxima b, the Nanocraft would make it in 20! Read that again: 30,000 years condensed to 20! The Nanocraft would travel up to 20% the speed of light, and it could be happening within the next 10 years!

Again, I’m not much of a space girl, but that is amazing! Anyone else feel like they are beginning to live the movie “Interstellar”? As long as Matthew McConaughey is with me, I’ll be alright!mv5bmjixntu4mzy4mf5bml5banbnxkftztgwmzm4odi3mje-_v1_uy1200_cr6906301200_al_

Friends are in your heart forever.

Feeling a little blue tonight. Not sure why. Just a heavy heart and mind.

I’ve actually seen a few memes lately that have been weighing on my heart. Sounds silly, I know, but they really struck my heart string. One said that if you try to reach out to someone and they don’t do the same for you then forget them, but not a scroll later did I see the same meme with an X mark through the first statement and a further explanation of, no, do it. Always try when the person means something to you.

I’m kind of feeling both right now. I had a friend, KMK, for those of you who read one of my previous posts, “Growing Up is Hard to Do, But I had You,” that was literally the best friend I could ever ask for. She was always there for me, but after I got married, we drifted apart.i hate that! With all my being, I hate that we hardly talk anymore.

About two years after my wedding, I reached out to her just to see if we could possibly still be friends, and we texted for a bit before we stopped talking again for almost another year. When her twin KAK passed away, I literally felt like one of the worst people in existence because it had been so long since I had talked to KMK, and the first time I was seeing her again was at her twins funeral.

I never want that to happen between me and another friend again. I never want to go without talking to someone I care so much for for so long. I want to try and be a better friend. I want to always try to reach out to those I love and not care if they don’t reciprocate. photo-1461720486092-b6ee3f33d726

But when they don’t show the same sort of feeling, what am I supposed to do? There are times with KMK that I try and text her and receive no response. We are busy adults, I know, so I don’t take it personally most of the time, but sometimes when we talk, it feels so forced. How do I make it better? Can I make it better? Or is it one of those things that I have to take what I can get?

I miss my best friend, but maybe as you get older, best friends are just what you called people you saw all the time at school, not what you have through adulthood. Maybe when you become an adult, your life becomes your best friend. Doesn’t sound so bad, I guess, unless its days or nights like today when I could really use my best friend’s ear.

Book Review: Mine to Keep by Cynthia Eden

Remember my post a few weeks ago? Well, at the end of it, I said I needed to do my homework and not read the next novel in the Mine Series. Guess what I didn’t do?

Mine to Keep by Cynthia Eden41rahhxsxpl

Rating: 4

Mine to Keep is the second novel in the Mine series by Cynthia Eden, published and self-published author of romantic suspense and paranormal romance novels. This first novel hooked me into the story of Skye and Trace, and I just couldn’t let them go! I had to know what happened next in their story. Did Trace finally come clean about his past? Would Skye be able to handle the burden of his secrets?

Skye shoved her doubts and fears away. This was Trace. They’d survived hell before. They could survive anything that came their way. “I already have everything,” Skye said softly.. – Mine to Keep by Cynthia Eden

Just a month following the horrific stalker/abductor incident that shook Skye’s world, the nightmares wake her nightly, and Trace’s guards follow her every move, but she demands some normalcy back into her life. Determined now more than ever to start her dance studio, Skye pushes herself beyond her limits to achieve her dreams, but a dark cloud follows her every move. She knows Trace has secrets and has done things he wasn’t proud of, but why couldn’t he trust her enough to share his burden? Didn’t he understand that anything that touched him, touched her, too?

When you put your trust in the wrong person, you opened yourself up for all kinds of hurt. – Mine to Keep by Cynthia Eden 

Trace would do anything to make Skye happy. Shower her with gifts, promise a future, help her get her studio off the ground. He just couldn’t understand why she needed his past, too. There was nothing there that she needed to know, or so he thought. When a ghost from his past comes back to threaten his future, his life, and everything he ever loved and trusted, he faces the very real possibility of losing Skye again, but this time not just by breaking up. He has to let her in, has to reveal his true self, but will it be too late?


Another amazing novel by Eden to add to my love affair with Skye and Trace. I’m hesitant to move on to the third Mine novel because I am still on suspenseful romance clouds, but I am hoping that even though the focus is on new characters introduced in this book that Skye and Trace will still be in the background.

The first novel was absolute tops in my opinion. This second novel while fantastic as well didn’t leave me with the same happy sigh at the end. There was a whole scene dedicated to Skye being upset that Trace basically watched her from afar for ten years plus had guards on her without her knowledge, but I really didn’t understand why she was upset until the very end of it. I wish her feelings had been fleshed out a bit more, but once her “I was put in a cage that I didn’t even know I was in,” speech came about, I was totally on board!

Then the ending left me hanging a bit. Trace comes back, but what happens next? Back to the penthouse? Back to the private island? Marriage, babies? Don’t leave me hanging, Cynthia! :) I love this romance between Skye and Trace, and feel that Skye became even stronger in this novel than the first. Hopefully, they are still secondary characters in the rest of the Mine series, but I won’t know until my homework is finished. (Wink, Wink)

Find The One Who Will Lift You Up

Af0sF2OS5S5gatqrKzVP_SilhoutteIt has been twelve years that my husband and I have been together, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him. I’m normally the more romantic of the two of us, and today, I’m feeling extra mushy. I have tried our entire relationship to explain to him what he means to me, but I’m better with written words than I am with spoken. No matter how much I write or speak, though, it never seems enough.

How do you explain to someone that literally saved your life how much they mean to you?

As a teenager, I got mixed up with a bad crowd and an even worse relationship. My last middle school year through my early high school years were the darkest parts of my life. I have a lot of regrets during those years, but my biggest mistakes were when I hurt the man I love. I was a young kid then, but those mistakes still haunt me. Not because they have any effect on our relationship (he says he never thinks about it unless I bring it up), but because I realize now how naive I had been and how much pain I had caused my now husband.

Through all the mistakes and all the irresponsible decisions I made, he stood by me, and I couldn’t be more thankful that he did. He helped me through those horrid years and brought me back to life in the light. Without him, I know I wouldn’t be where I am, let alone the person I am today. He saved me from a life I never want to think I would’ve lived, and although I have tried, I don’t think I will ever be able to thank him, or show him how much I appreciate him enough.

I always tell him that he pulls me up and allows me to float in the clouds, pushes me to dream even the wildest of possibilities like becoming a writer while I keep him grounded, the realist of us two and knower of all things Household Chamberlin. Without him, I would have never pursued writing or self-published any of my works. Honestly, I don’t know that I would have any of the things I have in my life right now if he wasn’t my other half.

How do you show enough gratitude to someone who has given you and helped you achieve everything you have ever dreamed of?

I am so thankful and blessed for the photo-1465508421127-4cbee06c9e73life I have with my husband and now talking-and-toddling daughter because without either of them, I wouldn’t be as happy as I am now. And maybe one day, I will think of a way to repay my husband for all he has done for me over the years. Maybe when we are old and gray, and I have to remind him where he put his teeth in order for him to eat his favorite meal will he finally understand exactly how much I love him.

Book Review: Mine to Take by Cynthia Eden

It has been a while since I have actually sat down and read a book. With school, work, and my daughter, I just haven’t been able to find the time. Well, last night, I finally did it! I read a whole book in about three hours with interruptions, of course, such as bath and bedtime routine. It was a quick read, relatively short book, but it packed a whopping punch.18053913

Mine to Take by Cynthia Eden

Rating: 4.5 Stars

I love Cynthia Eden! I have read her entire Bound series which hooked me on her as an author, and just recently found this novel since it was a freebie on Amazon. (One of the best ways for an Indie Author to market themselves because I went searching for the next book in the series and purchased it!) She is a semi-Indie Author who has been published by various firms, but takes pride in her independent accomplishments, and as well she should. I have yet to read a novel that I did not thoroughly enjoy by her! And Mine to Take is no different.

Skye Sullivan is a talented prima-ballerina who had a car accident which maimed her leg and stripped her of her ability to dance professionally. With a long past of darkness, Skye is used to feeling fear and pain, but for months before her accident, she feels as if someone had been watching her, breaking into her apartment and moving things, even stealing her underwear from her drawers. The police didn’t believe her before, nor after her accident, so she turned to the one man she knew she could count on. A man from her dark past she had never been able to forget.

Some men left a mark on a woman, a mark that went far beneath the skin. – Mine to Take by Cynthia Eden

Skye seems to be a frail woman, but her soul is strong. After her parents died when she was a child, she bounced through the system, never feeling safe or unafraid. She lived with the fear and pain until she found her way to a dance floor. She had found her release and her passion, but one man would always trump her need to dance.

Trace Weston is a self-made millionaire who pulled himself from the slums and into high society in a way he would never admit. His security firm based its riches on corporations, but when Skye walks into his office with a bone chilling story of a stalker, he dedicates all of his resources to protecting, including himself. He had let her go once before, and he wouldn’t make that mistake again, but before he could have her the way he wanted, he had to make sure she was safe.

There were some things a man could never forget. – Mine to Take by Cynthia Eden

Trace had met Skye as a teenager, saved her the first night they had met, too. He was a dominate man, strong and powerful in demeanor, and when it came to Skye, his reflex was to keep her close. She was the one that got away, but he wouldn’t let her go a second time.


There were so many twists and turns in the short novel that I absolutely loved. The pace kept you on the edge of your seat, and you constantly questioned who the stalker was. Eden almost had be convinced that it was Trace when the detective was grilling him at the police station in front of Skye, but the scene where she was dancing in the club and practically begged Trace not to be the stalker convinced me it wasn’t him. The vulnerability of Trace and Skye in that moment was beautiful!

The only thing I wish that would have played out a bit more was the captive scene toward the end when Loxley went to where he had Skye imprisoned, and he was going to take her away, so that Trace or anyone else couldn’t find her. It seemed so very short that he was going to clean her up, and she thought that Trace was dead, but on the other hand, it was kind of a relief that it wasn’t too drawn out. Stalker situations like that can be a bit dark and aggressive, so not pushing the boundary too hard was a bit welcoming after all the main characters had been through.

All and all, a great quick read when you are hungry for a good book, but are strapped for time. Now on to homework. Boo! I want to read Mine to Keep!

Zika: The New, Big, Bad, Scary Disease

Am I missing something here?

How to Avoid Zika Virus Mosquito Bites


I do not claim to be or have ever been a medical doctor or scientist, but with all the research being done right now on the Zika virus, and I am failing to see why this “new” disease is suddenly so big, bad, and scary. I understand for women who are pregnant that this is a very real threat, but other than for this minority group, I don’t understand why everyone else is freaking out.

I did some research, and again I am no doctor or scientist, but if a mosquito carrying the virus bites you and you become infected then you are only infected with the virus for about a week, says the CDC on their website: After a week, you will most likely be protected from future infections.

Once the week of infection is up which only provides cold/flu like symptoms, some doctors and researchers are recommending you abstain or use protection during sexual intercourse for a period of eight weeks to six months after all symptoms have stopped. If you have traveled to an area that is known to have mosquitos carrying the virus, but do not show any symptoms, doctors and researchers are recommending the eight week abstain and/or protected sex period. These recommendations can be found on the WHO website:

All this to say that if you are not trying to have a child or are already pregnant with one, why is the world so afraid of this virus? Again I stress the fact that if you are trying to get pregnant or already are pregnant, then I understand why these people are uneasy, but take some of the Olympic athletes as an example.  rio-olympics-2016-logo-on-white_1920x1200_947-wide

Hope Solo is the first to come to mind. She recently posted pictures of multiple different methods of bug repellent to which the crowd in Brazil booed her relentlessly during the first women’s soccer meet of the games, and even at times screaming “Zika!” Solo was married in 2012, so I guess there could be a possibility that she may want to get pregnant in the next eight weeks to six months, but since she knows the risk and is taking precautions then her next logical step would be to abstain or use protection until she has passed the milestone for infection.

Another example would be Michael Phelps. Now he just had a baby, so unless he and his wife want their children very close in age (I don’t know how people manage two infants/toddlers at the same time, so it just seems unlikely to me), I don’t see why he would be concerned with this virus. He is not trying to have another baby right now and his wife already gave birth to a healthy boy, therefore, in my opinion, his fear of this virus should none.

Remember the recent Ebola scare? Now that is a very real threat in my mind because not only did it make its way to the U.S., but it is a virus that can be airborne and result in death no matter your fertility status. I am in no way attempting to downplay the threat a mother may feel over her unborn child, but for those of us that are not with child or attempting to conceive, I am at a loss to why this virus is so scary.

Again I ask: am I missing something? Someone please enlighten me!


Drying Out My Mind

I’m starting to feel as if my mind won’t shut off. I have all these thoughts and feelings just swirling within my brain like a dark, daunting twister that I can’t shut off. It is literally starting to make me feel like Atlas, just not with the world on my shoulders but trying to hold up my own head. I’m sure you and I both know why, with the passing of my close friend recently and she has been heavy on my heart the past few weeks, but it is really curious to me why my mind goes in these random directions rather than focused on what you would think would be the norm. 

Occasionally we will be overwhelmed, but mostly we will be enchanted. – Jean Houston 

Ha! The norm. I hear that all the time as a new mom. (How long can I consider myself a new mom before it isn’t true anymore?) If I say, oh, I’m tired, there is always someone there to say, oh, you’ll be that way until your kid is 18. It’s normal. Or if I say, man, I wish I had time to do whatever then someone always pipes up, oh, you will one day when your baby is grown. It’s just how it will be from here until they go to college. But that’s normal. 

Let me blow your mind for a second here. How about normal is synonymous with the same as everybody else, and we all know that no baby is the same as the next. In my mind, no two humans are alike, either, therefore, there is no normal. We each are trying to get through this life with the most amazing experiences we can find, and the definition of amazing is different for all of us. Wow! Take that pill with a dry mouth.  

Again, I stress the fact that my mind is uncontrollably firing in all directions. I can’t quite pinpoint where my focus is, so I feel like I am literally all over the place! This post is definitely going to be more of just getting this off my chest since for one, I missed posting this past week, and two, I can’t target exactly what I am feeling. I seriously feel like a jar of fireflies flying aimlessly and lighting randomly through the night. 1

A quiet mind is able to hear intuition over fear. 

The above is a link to an article I really needed to read right about now.  

And I just remembered that I need to do my homework. Ugh. Maybe that will help me focus my mind on something specific. A thought on a single track would be nice right about now, but I’m not sure if the light at the end of the tunnel is the sun or an oncoming train. Choo-choo!

Bedtime Sonnets

​My mind is feeling a little foggy with different words and POVs. I don’t think these are really meant to be one flowing poem, but that’s the way they flew out. When the muse knocks..

If you can act like you don’t see me
Then was I ever really there?
If you can pretend to forget about me
Then was I ever really a memory?
If you can replace me with someone new
Then was I ever really near you?

Life moves on
As the earth spins,
And I used to think
It spun around you,
But now you’re gone,
and I feel alone.
What will I do?

If I can’t act like I don’t see you
Then I know you still exist.
If I can’t pretend to forget you
Then I’ll live with your memory.
If I can’t replace you with someone new
Then I’ll hold what I have left of you close.

For every day you aren’t with me,
I miss you more and more.
For every day I miss you,
My heart splinters a little greater.
I hope one day I find you on a golden, sandy shore
Because that’s when I’ll show you what you mean to me.
That’s when I’ll prove you’re the one for me.

Listen close, my dearest.
Be sure to hear my words
Because one day they’ll be a whisper
You had once heard.
I know the secret of life
If you really want to know.
You have to have faith in others
Even if they let you down
Because only then will you understand
The treasure that can be found
From someone else’s perspective
That you never saw before.
Listen close, my darling, 
Come and gather round.
Repeat to me my ramblings,
So I know you understand.
This secret will keep you going
As you fumble through this life.
If nothing else, my sweetest,
Keep it safe and hold it tight.

Time for bed, I guess, now that my mind has dried out a bit. Sweet dreams!