Theme of the Week: Forgiveness and Forgetting

Welcome back, my fellow seekers!

Recently in my life, I have had to find it within myself to forgive an incident that I am not sure I can forget. Circumstances have it that I found out some information that hurt me deeply, but because I know my feelings towards this situation would not have me run from it, forgiveness is my only other option. As women, we all know the phrase “forgive and forget”, but we also know that the first part comes easy once you are ready to offer the sign of peace; it’s the latter half that takes time. 

Forgetting seems to have become such an act of random selection in the human brain. You read some information, and our minds only retain about 10% of it. You experience a moment in your life, and depending on the gravity of the event, some can either explain every sensory feeling they had within it, or they will say “That was a good time,” without anymore detail. Or, you go through something truly horrific, maybe not just physically trying, but mentally shaking you to your core. This moment leads you to believe that it had all been a lie, and you can remember every nerve ending that shot signals through your system causing your body to literally revolt to the situation, but because you forgave, you are expected to forget. 

I love the romance genre; both of my publications have been within this category, but sometimes, when a character goes through a moment that seems to put them through hell and then they forgive and forget, I can honestly say I envy these characters for it.

I know most people don’t consider “Twilight” to be anything more than a teenage drama, barely even literature, but I enjoyed it when I was a teenager, so excuse the reference, and this may contain ***SPOILERS***.

When Edward leaves Bella in the second book, “New Moon”, her whole world seems to crash in on her. She falls so deeply into depression; I could feel her heart completely shatter and leave the hollow hole in its stead. By the end of the book, it’s Bella that has to save Edward, and while I understand she loves him, after all she went through when he left and her fear arising that he would do the same again even after she saves him, I just can’t understand how she could forget so easily. To reiterate, I understand she loves him, her one true love, but how can she forget so easily?

How about “Beautiful Disaster”? Abby is basically trapped in Travis’s apartment because of a deal she made, but because of some little tiff between her and Travis before they even started dating, he went out, got drunk, brought home two women, and slept with them in the same house she was staying in. I get that they weren’t together, yet, but to have heard every noise then be able to forget and start dating the guy. No, way!

Taking this away from the romance genre a second, because not all problems are within romantic relationships, a very good read, what I can most contribute the beginning of my reading and writing journey to, “Gone for Good” by Harlan Coben is more of a mystery/crime drama.

Will believes his brother is dead, but upon finding proof that he is alive, Will finds more than just the one truth. Will knows his brother is the prime suspect in the murder of his girlfriend, but when his brother, Ken, reveals that he and the girl had been hooking up, Will was willing to let Ken run again as the cops were closing in. Now, I love my sister, but if she had such deep secrets and revealed them to me just as she was about to be arrested or run, I don’t think I could have let her get away with it.

Maybe these characters have more courage than I do, but to know the situation, to have forgiven the incident and am willing to move on, I am just having trouble with the forgetting part. Maybe time is the key; maybe patience, which I know I am lacking in my life. Whatever it is, I know I have forgiven with my whole heart, but how do you forget as easily? 

Book Review: Beautiful Disaster Part 2

After my previous posting on this novel, I read into some other people’s reviews, wondering how well the book was viewed by others since it has become one of my top five favorite. I was very interested in what I found.   While the majority of the reviews were all filled with very well received comments, there were more than a few of them claiming the book was based on an abusive relationship.

WHAT?!

First of all, there are no signs of physical abuse in this novel whatsoever, so let me put the potential reader at ease before I continue. Never once do either main characters or any of the sub characters touch each other with anything other than love except when Travis is MMA like fighting, then he kicks butt, but other than that, there are no signs of physical abuse. There is no verbal abuse, either. The only abuse I can think these people are somehow relating to is mental, but even that is a stretch.

Never once do either of the main characters, Abby and Travis, make the other feel unworthy of love or unhappy with themselves. Mental abuse in a relationship is when a partner makes the other party feel less of a person. Jamie McGuire never once allows her characters to go to that level, therefore, I have no clue what these people are talking about.  Throughout the novel there are a lot of give and takes within the Abby and Travis relationship, but neither one of them ever cross a line in their relationship that verges on abuse, so the only thing I can think people are skewing is that Abby and Travis live to torture each other. Shep, Travis’s roommate and cousin, even says that very line on page 249 right before they go to the first fraternity date party. They make each other crazy, sometimes jealous on purpose, but it is only because they have never experienced a love that unfolds throughout the novel.

Travis and Abby both have a love that is so deep and passionate. It is something that few ever experience, and something that most people are afraid of because they don’t understand it, but it is not something that the two characters do not want. There is never a time throughout the novel that either character actually comes out and says that they do not want what the other is giving, or that they need help out of the situation because they do not want it. So as two grown adults are in a relationship and have so much feeling toward each other, I am confused at where these people think the abuse is.

Travis is a fighter which just further points to his personality in love. He loves Abby so much, body and soul, that being without her is something that he cannot live with. If you have never felt that way about somebody, felt so strongly for someone that if they were not part of your life then you would fall apart, then you have never felt true love. A love so pure that you didn’t know you were looking for it or missing it until you found it.

This type of passion is not for the weak minded, but I promise, for those that know what this all consuming love is like, you will not be disappointed in this novel.

 

Book Review: Beautiful Disaster

On my latest venture of finding new characters and a new world to love, a family member suggested this novel to me, “Beautiful Disaster” by Jamie McGuire. I love the romance genre and after the last few books I had read, I was craving a modern romance full of passion. This novel did not disappoint!

Abby is the type of girl you automatically assume is the quiet type, withdrawn and to herself, but if you have known this type of girl, you know they are the ones to watch out for. Abby may be quiet, but she has a lot of life behind her that she wishes would stay there.

Enter Travis. Now, your typical bad boy is the one in the leather jacket and a sailors mouth, and while Travis is both of those things, there is so much more to his character than just bad boy. He’s a fighter, best of the best in the ring, but outside of it, Travis is a lover. At first, all we see him as is a player, but once he sets his sights on Abby, you can clearly see the true passion he is capable of and the fighter he is for what he loves.

Instead of going deep within the novel’s story line, I thought that I would give you my favorite quotes. Every scene in this novel is charged with emotion, and most dialogues are dripping with passion. To give you an idea of what I’m talking about, instead of trying to describe it, just read the below.

“You know why I want you? I didn’t know I was lost until you found me. I didn’t know what alone was until the first night I spent without you in my bed. You’re the one thing I’ve got right. You’re what I’ve been waiting for.”  

“I know we’re fucked up, all right? I’m impulsive, and hot-tempered, and you get under my skin like no one else. You act like you hate me one minute, and then you need me the next. I never get anything right, and I don’t deserve you…but I fucking love you, Abby. I love you more than I’ve loved anyone or anything, ever. When you’re around, I don’t need booze, or money, or the fighting, or the one-night stands…all I need is you. You’re all I think about. You’re all I dream about. You’re all I want.”  

“I knew the second I met you that there was something about you I needed. Turns out it wasn’t something about you at all. It was just you.”

“You can’t tell me what to do anymore, Travis! I don’t belong to you!” In the second it took him to turn and face me, his expression had contorted into anger. He stomped toward me, planting his hands on the bed and leaning into my face. “WELL I BELONG TO YOU!” The veins in his neck bulged as he shouted, and I met his glare, refusing to even flinch. He looked at my lips, panting. “I belong to you.”

 If you are looking for a five star novel full of passion and your next book boyfriend, pick up Beautiful Disaster! You will not be disappointed.