The New Year – Keeping it moving

This year, I’m not going to set any resolutions like I have in the past because most of them would remain the same. Not for lack of progress, but simply because I want to continue to build upon what I have accomplished thus far. I want to be healthier, to travel more than I already have, and write more. Those items haven’t changed from last year. What has changed is my perspective on those items.

Healthier is no longer this unobtainable goal that I quit trying for halfway through the year. It’s a constant effort for the rest of my life to work on my crazy eating habits and chocolate addiction. Every little step I take towards becoming healthier is a feat.

I’ve traveled to one new place this year, a mountain resort nearby for my daughter’s birthday. It wasn’t my favorite trip by far, but gladly, we were able to take a mini vacation to the beach with family over the summer to make up for it. I want to continue to travel and see new places, even if they are close to home.

Lastly, I want to write! But when don’t I? I have the sequel to Guardians going through the editing process for publishing sometime in Spring 2019, and the third installment set for completion sometime in late Summer 2019. I have other ideas to explore, blogs and articles to write. I just love doing it, so continue on I will.

So, these really aren’t resolutions anymore. They’ve kind of become my new way of being. I will carry on and build upon my accomplishments because it’s what I want out of life, not just one year in the midst of a century.

Tattoo Me

I now have a total of four tattoos. Judge me all you want if you don’t like tattoos, but I love them, and before you step on your soap box, here me out. Each and every one of them have meaning.

The first tattoo I got at 18, young, wild, and free. My best friend at the time and I got matching butterflies on our ankles. The artists weren’t the greatest, and the butterflies are lackluster, but in that moment, it was exactly what I wanted. I wanted to do something crazy, something our parents probably wouldn’t like, but most of all, I wanted to make a lifelong memory with my best friend. Now, it’s a forever reminder of that crazy summer, one I will never and don’t want to ever forget.

My second tattoo was in two parts. The first was a word, Fayeth, and later I added a Navy anchor and the article “of”, so it became Anchor of Fayeth. This is my dedication to my husband’s grandparents who passed in 2011 and I was very close with.

Next and more recently, I added a tribute to my maternal grandparents who passed in 2015. A horseshoe and rose over my right shoulder will forever symbolize the greatest memories I have with them.

Lastly, the sparrow and nautical star on my other ankle. This is extremely emotional for me to discuss because the greatest sense of loss I have ever experienced in my life thus far is the day I lost one of my closest friends since childhood. It was just too soon, completely unexpected. She drew this sparrow and star so long ago, but it’s because she drew it that I have placed it on my body forever.

So, you may still not like them, but you cannot deny that sometimes they have a greater meaning and purpose. They may not be for you, but they are exactly what I need.

Pieces of me

Hello, my dear friends. It has been a while.

I’ve been away, but I have not gone

Far enough to forget you,

So let me apologize and

Verbalize my intent to reconnect you

With my dreams and hopes and ramblings,

Which I so often do.

My name is Lindsay Chamberlin, and I love to write. I’ve self-published a few novels, and intend to do more of the same. I am a mother, a wife, and co-provider for my family, so for now, writing is what I do to keep my soul alive. One day it may be more, but I promise you it will never be less. My entire life is made up of things I do for others and I wouldn’t have it any other way, but this, writing, is what I do for me.

An example, here,

In the midst of it all

That life without this tiny piece of me,

Which makes up the largest part of my soul,

Is crazy and draining,

No matter how much I love it.

I need this piece of me

Like I need you to love it

Because this is all of me,

And I hope you enjoy it.

Google IT Technician Certification

I have been working on obtaining my mac-glasses for a few weeks now. And by a few weeks, I mean more than four. And by more than four, I mean a few months. And by a few, I mean three. Luckily, it stops there.

There are six modules in a course, and each of the modules has several lessons. I almost completed the first module and have started the second. The information is really thorough, and I feel like this small portion I have completed has taught me a lot already. Things like binary and building a computer from scratch. It really is interesting, but I’m moving a lot slower than I anticipated. It’s not that I’m bored with the content; I really think the reason is because of the nature of the courses.

At SNHU, even though it was an online school which allowed you to learn at your own pace, there was structure, deadlines, and someone holding you accountable. With this Google IT Technician Certification, the only person to hold you accountable is you. Sure, there are “professors” teaching you the lessons via the recorded streaming videos, but they aren’t active in your learning, checking up on you, marking down your grade if you don’t complete an assignment within the allotted week. You are literally on your own to take the lessons.

Hold myself accountable, you say? Oh, why didn’t I think of that! Wait, I did, and failed. Miserably. I need a new strategy, but I am really struggling with time management. Maybe I still have senioritis from graduating a year ago. Maybe my willpower is just depleted along with my sanity and drive to focus on anything other than making it through my day to day. Wow, that sounds like a very sad existence.

WAKE UP CALL!! I’m hearing it. I’ve got to get my big ole’ head back in the game! (Too High School Musical for you? Me too.)

To Grieve or To Mourn

migraineWith the sudden passing of one of the best friends two years ago, I have come to find that there is no right or wrong way to grieve or mourn. There is no appropriate set amount of time. There is no reason to tell anyone or to not tell everyone. How ever someone decides to cope with the sense of loss within their lives is entirely up to the individual. The thought of another anniversary of that day has brought these thoughts to the forefront of my mind because even two years later, I still grieve and mourn for the loss of my friend.

While in the throes of my mourning, I started to contemplate what grieving versus mourning really meant. Obviously, loss, sadness, emotional and mental suffering with possible physical pain, but I started to think of their actual definition and wondered if there was a significant difference in the two. What do you know? There is.

Dictionary.com says, “Grieve is the stronger word, implying deep mental suffering often endured alone and in silence but revealed by one’s aspect: to grieve over the loss (or death) of a friend. Mourn usually refers to manifesting sorrow outwardly, either with or without sincerity: to mourn publicly and wear black.”

So, I did what made sense to me. I categorized myself into a group based on the way I deal with the loss of my friend. I believe there are three types of people when it comes to feelings of loss. These types are points on a line spectrum, so there are those who may lean a little from the main point, but I’m sure most can find themselves closer to one point than another.

Boisterous Wailers

These are people who weep loudly for all to hear. They don’t care who is around, or where they are. When the mood strikes them, they will belt out their frustration with whatever sorrow has found them and force whoever or whatever is around them to feel and look the same. They throw things. They scream and curse everyone. These are the types of people who refuse to go through their pain alone, so the world will hear them during their pain.

Silent Sufferers

We all know these types of people. They are the kind who refuse to let anyone in during a time of loss. They push everyone away and insist they are dealing with their suffering when in reality, it weighs on them every moment of every day as they make their way silently through their new world of loss. You may never see these people act out, let alone discuss it. They see the world as full of pain, so why would anyone want to hear about theirs.

Hybrid Comfort Finders

I like to think I have developed a sense of the middle ground between the two aforementioned types of individuals. There are days where I just try to make it through, and there are days where I need help. There are days where I hope the neighbors don’t come to check on me and days where I can smile regardless of my heart breaking. All the days in between, the ones where I don’t believe I lean from this center ground, I find comfort in the beauty of my life. I hug my husband and daughter a little tighter. I eat an extra piece of chocolate, or watch a favorite movie. I find the things that make me happy, and for those few moments, the pain isn’t so heavy, and the world isn’t as dark.

Grieving, mourning; it’s all the same sense of loss. It’s how you make it through the day that matters.

Valerian – Movie Review

May be a little late to the party, but I figured I could give my two cents on this movie in case anyone has held out longer than I have from watching it.

The amount of money dumped into this film for its graphics must have been astronomical! Almost every “person” in this film was somehow CGI’ed to an alien species. The worlds they created were so well thought out in depth. The vivid imagery was mesmerizing as was the story once it finally got going. I can’t imagine the man-hours and time it took to produce this film.

51b1d40punl-_sy453_bo1204203200_IMDB: A dark force threatens Alpha, a vast metropolis and home to species from a thousand planets. Special operatives Valerian and Laureline must race to identify the marauding menace and safeguard not just Alpha, but the future of the universe.

I had no idea this movie was based on a French comic. How interesting! Although, that’s about as interesting as it gets. Everything I said above is true, but the WOW factor stopped at the graphics. The actors were not my favorite. The enthusiasm of the movie was a bit flat.

To come up with a universe so vast and tapped into, a universe of over a thousand inhabited worlds, is too big for my brain to comprehend. I think that is ultimately what kept my interest, the idea of the infinite. How anyone can even attempt to grasp the concept is beyond me. I feel as if my brain is leaving gravity’s tug whenever the idea of how truly expansive the universe is floats within my thoughts.

Overall, I would recommend the movie, but with the disclaimer not to go into it expecting anything award winning.

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel – Season 2

If you didn’t know that I am absolutely in love with the Amazon series “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” then you don’t know me at all! I binge watched this show the week it came out, and I have missed it so much! I have been dying to know when the next season will come out, and finally Amazon has given a release date!

DECEMBER 5, 2018

No one talk to me for a week. Expect nothing out of me during this time. I will be holed up in my room every night watching this show until I have gorged on Rachel Brosnahan and Tony Shalhoub to my hearts content then immediate demise as I have to wait who know how long for the next season! Oh, the tragedy of a streaming series!

If you know nothing about this series, please allow me to enlighten you. It is magnificent!!

maisel65628816.jpgAmazon – The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Season 1: Winner of 8 Emmy Awards. In 1958 New York, Midge Maisel’s life is on track- husband, kids, and elegant Yom Kippur dinners in their Upper West Side apartment. But when her life takes a surprise turn, she has to quickly decide what else she’s good at – and going from housewife to stand-up comic is a wild choice to everyone but her.

Amazon – The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Season 2: After Midge’s triumph at the Gaslight, the fallout from her takedown of Sophie Lennon looms large, making her climb up the comedy ladder more challenging than ever. As the actual grind of being a comic begins to take its toll on Midge, the pressure to come clean to her family weighs on her – especially as her choices have a ripple effect on everyone around her.

BINGE, BINGE, BINGE!!

Coffee is my lifeblood

I must have a cup of coffee in the morning! You think the boogey monster is scary; you should see me without coffee. I can’t function without it. My brain refuses to wake up until my cup is empty.

Honestly, the caffeine is needed, but it is not what drives me to it. The warmth of the liquid. The swirling steam billowing from the cup. The earthy, roasted aroma soothing my muddled brain. It’s like a pep talk in a cup. A reassuring hug first thing in the morning. Coffee doesn’t judge. Coffee understands. I may look a hot mess in the morning, and the noises reverberating from my throat may sound like a terrifying monster, but coffee just smiles and says, “drink me, and I’ll turn you into a princess”.

OK, princess is a stretch, but once I’m done with that first cup, I tell you what, THE QUENN REIGNS!

OK, again, I stretch the truth, but you get the point. I drink the stuff. I do the stuff. An elixir of life! I’m too dramatic for my own good.

Can you guess how many cups I’ve had today? 🙂

My Husband’s Triumphant Thirtieth Birthday

chamberlin801911881-04938898784.jpgToday is my husband’s thirtieth birthday! He and I met when he was 15 and I was 14. Now officially marks the year when I have known him just as long as I haven’t. He lived 15 years without me, and has now lived 15 years with me. Makes us sound old, but as high school sweethearts, our milestones will be plentiful.

It’s crazy to think of our teenage selves back in high school and all the years after that we went through together. The phrase “growing together” has never made more sense as we have accomplished so much by each others sides. We have worked so hard for everything we have that I know with this monumental birthday we are heading for even greater. I can’t imagine what my life would be like without him, and I thank my lucky stars everyday that I never have to wonder.

I’ve heard people call this the “dirty thirty” birthday, but I promise you, babe, this year will be the Triumphant Thirty. I love you!